I have a big dilemma coming tomorrow. It is bigger than I thought and it could affect the future of my two girls for years to come. Well, not really. I have been told by a very creditable person (my wife) that I tend to make more of an issue than there really is sometimes.
It is this: do I let my two girls watch the wedding of Kate and Prince William?
For me, I really have no interest in this whatsoever. The whole monarch thing is foreign (no pun intended) to me. I don't get it and even when it's explained to me by those who are passionate about it, I still don't get it. How can we still have kings and queens within a country who don't really run the country? Am I missing something here? Likely.
Back to the wedding. My dilemma is this: I don't want them to get the idea that they will actually get to be a princess someday. For me, this wedding ranks up there with Santa, the Easter bunny and the Great Pumpkin. It's a nice story, but it is not the truth. I want them to believe that being a princess really is a fairy tale, a dream and a nice Disney story. I don't want them to think that marriage is something that it is not. It is not about becoming a princess. Maybe that is what draws so many women into this wedding.
After all the pomp and stuff, Prince Billy and Kate will still have to live with one another and hopefully honor God by their marriage. They will have to put in the work it will take to stay together because there is no such thing as "happily ever after".
Thursday, April 28, 2011
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
Guys Made Simple
Guys are really simple. And I think that life would have less stress in it if we all embraced the simpicity that are men.
Guys like one stop shopping. Go to Walmart or Target even Menards and you can get everything that you need for the day. Diapers to dry wall screws. Industrial size containers of Cheez Balls to chairs.
Guys like shampoos that are all in one. Body wash, shampoo and conditioner in one bottle is simply simple.
Guys like one pot cooking. Even if the dinner looks like something from Bizzare Foods with Andrew Zimmern the family WILL EAT IT!
Guys don't get buyers remorse. When see something that we like, it pretty much sticks in our brain until we get it. And if we paid too much for the thing, we keep it anyway. Returns are not simple.
Our attire is simple. Pants in the winter, shorts in the summer. Coat when it snows or rains. Add sunglasses when it's sunny. Sunscreen? What do you think?
Guys are simple.
Guys like one stop shopping. Go to Walmart or Target even Menards and you can get everything that you need for the day. Diapers to dry wall screws. Industrial size containers of Cheez Balls to chairs.
Guys like shampoos that are all in one. Body wash, shampoo and conditioner in one bottle is simply simple.
Guys like one pot cooking. Even if the dinner looks like something from Bizzare Foods with Andrew Zimmern the family WILL EAT IT!
Guys don't get buyers remorse. When see something that we like, it pretty much sticks in our brain until we get it. And if we paid too much for the thing, we keep it anyway. Returns are not simple.
Our attire is simple. Pants in the winter, shorts in the summer. Coat when it snows or rains. Add sunglasses when it's sunny. Sunscreen? What do you think?
Guys are simple.
Monday, April 25, 2011
We Are Doing Something Right
Our family had a great Easter weekend. All of my girls were home. School is on break and my wife was home from work on Good Friday. It seems rarer that we are all together for an entire weekend.
Although it was rainy half of the weekend, we still got to do all the secular Easter things like color eggs, stuff candy in plastic eggs and spend about thirty minutes trying to get $.99 egg dye off the kitchen counter and my two year old. She thought that it would be fun to throw the egg in the dye instead of using the wire tool to gently drop it in the dye.
So before church on Sunday morning, Wendy and I hid all the eggs before the girls got up. Katie was up first looking for eggs even before both of her eyes were open. Then we got Riley up so that they could find the eggs before we needed to get ready for the day.
We were standing in our hallway getting ready for the big hunt and Katie suggests that we pray before looking. And that she wanted to pray.
Her prayer went something like this. "Jesus, thank you for dying for my sins and thank you for Easter and the candy eggs. Amen."
Wendy and I were surprised and happy that she gets that Easter is not about a bunny and candy eggs but that it has a bigger meaning: Jesus.
After her prayer, we both had the same thought: Maybe we are doing something right after all.
Although it was rainy half of the weekend, we still got to do all the secular Easter things like color eggs, stuff candy in plastic eggs and spend about thirty minutes trying to get $.99 egg dye off the kitchen counter and my two year old. She thought that it would be fun to throw the egg in the dye instead of using the wire tool to gently drop it in the dye.
So before church on Sunday morning, Wendy and I hid all the eggs before the girls got up. Katie was up first looking for eggs even before both of her eyes were open. Then we got Riley up so that they could find the eggs before we needed to get ready for the day.
We were standing in our hallway getting ready for the big hunt and Katie suggests that we pray before looking. And that she wanted to pray.
Her prayer went something like this. "Jesus, thank you for dying for my sins and thank you for Easter and the candy eggs. Amen."
Wendy and I were surprised and happy that she gets that Easter is not about a bunny and candy eggs but that it has a bigger meaning: Jesus.
After her prayer, we both had the same thought: Maybe we are doing something right after all.
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
Elite Company
Everyone wants to be in a class all by themselves. Whether it is in sports or business or fame, people want to be set apart and recognized. I was doing some research for a project last week and I found out that I am in a very elite class. But, it will not be earthly profitable like being the winner of American Idol.
It seems that being a stay at home parent is a rare thing. And being a stay at home dad is even rarer. The new normal is that both parents are working and the children under the age of 18 are either in daycare, school or after school care. Now, let me say that I know some families have no choice and that the kids have to go to daycare. Jobs and finances being what they are today makes that a necessity. I am not condemning anyone for that. So don't get me wrong.
So here are the figures. Now, these figures are for married couples with children only. According to the US Census Bureau, 2009 saw about 4 percent of women (963,000) as the only parent in the workforce. Compare that to men with about 28 percent (7.3 million) of them being the only parent working. But, 66 percent (17 million) of married couples were both working in 2009.
So here is the interesting part. Of the stay at home parents, 5.1 million of them are women while 158,000 are men. That is less than one percent of the married couples working. That number is actually up from 140,00 in 2008.
The US had about 330 million citizens in 2008 with about 120 million people working. It turns out that the percentage of stay at home dads to the total population in the US is 0.042 percent.
No wonder I have a hard time find other stay at home dads. I am in elite company.
It seems that being a stay at home parent is a rare thing. And being a stay at home dad is even rarer. The new normal is that both parents are working and the children under the age of 18 are either in daycare, school or after school care. Now, let me say that I know some families have no choice and that the kids have to go to daycare. Jobs and finances being what they are today makes that a necessity. I am not condemning anyone for that. So don't get me wrong.
So here are the figures. Now, these figures are for married couples with children only. According to the US Census Bureau, 2009 saw about 4 percent of women (963,000) as the only parent in the workforce. Compare that to men with about 28 percent (7.3 million) of them being the only parent working. But, 66 percent (17 million) of married couples were both working in 2009.
So here is the interesting part. Of the stay at home parents, 5.1 million of them are women while 158,000 are men. That is less than one percent of the married couples working. That number is actually up from 140,00 in 2008.
The US had about 330 million citizens in 2008 with about 120 million people working. It turns out that the percentage of stay at home dads to the total population in the US is 0.042 percent.
No wonder I have a hard time find other stay at home dads. I am in elite company.
Thursday, April 14, 2011
Here We GO Again
It is the small things that make being a stay at home parent worthwhile. The fun times laughing at a children's show, petting a bunny or jumping on a trampoline. The things that memories are made of. Even a stressed out, tired, stay at home dad can enjoy these things. But, it is also the small things that are as frustrating as all get out!
Two words for you: Potty Training. The rite of passage for kids around the world. So much of your future rides on potty training. It is so simple yet so hard for some kids. We have all heard the stories of children, mostly boys, that were not potty trained by Kindergarten. Oh the shame!
That is were I am at now. My 2.65 year old is struggling so much that we have given up. We have used tried and true methods of bribery and shame to no avail. There was progress when tempted with M&M's. But honestly, there is nothing that a kid won't do for that candy shelled treat. She has backslid to the point that she doesn't even understand that she has a full diaper of number two and if not checked on, will walk around with it for half the day oozing out of the top of her Pampers.
I don't remember my 5.43 year old being that hard to potty train. I guess that absence makes the heart grow fonder. Or more forgetful.
Two words for you: Potty Training. The rite of passage for kids around the world. So much of your future rides on potty training. It is so simple yet so hard for some kids. We have all heard the stories of children, mostly boys, that were not potty trained by Kindergarten. Oh the shame!
That is were I am at now. My 2.65 year old is struggling so much that we have given up. We have used tried and true methods of bribery and shame to no avail. There was progress when tempted with M&M's. But honestly, there is nothing that a kid won't do for that candy shelled treat. She has backslid to the point that she doesn't even understand that she has a full diaper of number two and if not checked on, will walk around with it for half the day oozing out of the top of her Pampers.
I don't remember my 5.43 year old being that hard to potty train. I guess that absence makes the heart grow fonder. Or more forgetful.
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Book Review: Faith Begins At Home by Mark Holmen
I just finished reading the book Faith Begins At Home by Mark Holmen. The book describes five areas for makeovers within a family: the home, the parents, the children, the extended family and the church. It gives practical examples of how to makeover each area that are easy implement and seem that they would be effective.
The Parenting Makeover section was interesting to me because I want to be able to connect with my girls early on. At this stage, connection is easy. Spending time with them playing or doing an activity is about all they need. But, when the teenage years come, that is a different ball game. One of the stories that is shared is about a father listening to his sons music that didn't have a Christian message. So, the dad went to the Christian bookstore, asked for some CD's that were a similiar genre as what he listened to and purchased a few of them. Then when they were in the car together, the dad asked if he could play a new CD he just bought. The son was surprised by what was coming out of the speakers. Dad then gave him the CD's.
That is just one example of a makeover that was made within a family. The book has many others that are just as easy and may make a family closer. I would highly recommend the book for any family. It is an easy read even for the busy stay at home dad.
The Parenting Makeover section was interesting to me because I want to be able to connect with my girls early on. At this stage, connection is easy. Spending time with them playing or doing an activity is about all they need. But, when the teenage years come, that is a different ball game. One of the stories that is shared is about a father listening to his sons music that didn't have a Christian message. So, the dad went to the Christian bookstore, asked for some CD's that were a similiar genre as what he listened to and purchased a few of them. Then when they were in the car together, the dad asked if he could play a new CD he just bought. The son was surprised by what was coming out of the speakers. Dad then gave him the CD's.
That is just one example of a makeover that was made within a family. The book has many others that are just as easy and may make a family closer. I would highly recommend the book for any family. It is an easy read even for the busy stay at home dad.
Monday, April 11, 2011
Seasons Are a' Changin
I don't know why I am so surprised by the sights and smells that precede the change of the seasons. You know, that smell on the first real Spring day or that crisp, cool, clean feeling in the Fall. This past weekend it was like summer in Wisconsin. Humid and 80F. Summer was in the air.
But like most seasons in Wisconsin, change came literally overnight. A storm went through and the humidity and temperature dropped by thirty degrees. This and the message that I heard on Sunday at church, got me thinking. My life has gone through changes as well and they can be described best as life seasons. Going through these times is challenging and sometimes confusing. But going through them is normal for all of us. And that is okay.
I think that going through seasons is never more pronounced than in stay at home parents. Now, I don't know for sure, but I would argue that being a stay at home dad is not a normal change in life seasons but it is more like going through a hurricane season with 15 named storms. God just gave moms a certain heart for parenting that men do not have. Not that parenting is impossible for men. It's just that we need to work a little harder being at home full time.
This change in seasons all came about within the last year or so. My wife and I love to train and compete in triathlons in all distances. We did Ironman Wisconsin together in 2009 (we won't talk about who beat who) and created a bond that will last a lifetime. But somewhere in the process of our second adoption, I lost the desire to seriously train (as serious as I can be) and compete. I can't focus on swimming or running or biking.
While those activities are beneficial to keep my love handles in check, they are not my focus. I may come back to them someday in a change of season. And that is okay.
There is a change of seasons happening. Can you feel it?
But like most seasons in Wisconsin, change came literally overnight. A storm went through and the humidity and temperature dropped by thirty degrees. This and the message that I heard on Sunday at church, got me thinking. My life has gone through changes as well and they can be described best as life seasons. Going through these times is challenging and sometimes confusing. But going through them is normal for all of us. And that is okay.
I think that going through seasons is never more pronounced than in stay at home parents. Now, I don't know for sure, but I would argue that being a stay at home dad is not a normal change in life seasons but it is more like going through a hurricane season with 15 named storms. God just gave moms a certain heart for parenting that men do not have. Not that parenting is impossible for men. It's just that we need to work a little harder being at home full time.
This change in seasons all came about within the last year or so. My wife and I love to train and compete in triathlons in all distances. We did Ironman Wisconsin together in 2009 (we won't talk about who beat who) and created a bond that will last a lifetime. But somewhere in the process of our second adoption, I lost the desire to seriously train (as serious as I can be) and compete. I can't focus on swimming or running or biking.
While those activities are beneficial to keep my love handles in check, they are not my focus. I may come back to them someday in a change of season. And that is okay.
There is a change of seasons happening. Can you feel it?
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
DIY Puppet Theater
My lastest project was a puppet theater for the girls to put on plays. I really needed something to get me outside and to get my hands dirty with. I love working with my hands and this is one project that is easy, inexpensive and fun to do.
You will need the following items:
One 4'x8'x3/4" sheet of plywood that is finished on both sides
36 inch peice of 1"x6" pine or oak for a shelf
Four 1x1 inch hinges
Two feet of light garden pot hanger chain (it's cheaper than chain)
Paint of choice
48 inch curtain rod
Curtain material
You will need to cut the plywood into one 4'x4' peice and two 2'x4' peices. Sand all sides to make sure that there are no rough edges. Cut a 3'x1' foot hole in the 4'x4' peice for the stage area. Cut or fit the 3' pine or oak shelf in. Secure with screws or nails. You can cut holes in the two smaller side peices if you would like. Use a lid or something for a perfect circle. I did and it looks nice. Paint all the peices. You should have 3 peices now.
After the paint dries, attach the hinges to the side panels about a foot from the top and the bottom. Then attach the hinges to the front 4'x4' panel with the stage. Hang the curtain rod on the back of the front peice. Buy or make some curtains for the stage that hang down a few inches below the stage.
Finally, attach a chain to the inside just below the top of the side panel and the front panel to keep it from opening all the way and falling down. Do this to both sides.
Here is what my girls got today. I am hoping that they get hours of fun. I am also expecting some sibling fighting or it as well.
I did have some of the parts but if I had to buy everything, it would have been about $25. Timewise, painting was the longest step. But, I figure I spent about 4 hours from start to finish.
Have fun and great dirty.
You will need the following items:
One 4'x8'x3/4" sheet of plywood that is finished on both sides
36 inch peice of 1"x6" pine or oak for a shelf
Four 1x1 inch hinges
Two feet of light garden pot hanger chain (it's cheaper than chain)
Paint of choice
48 inch curtain rod
Curtain material
You will need to cut the plywood into one 4'x4' peice and two 2'x4' peices. Sand all sides to make sure that there are no rough edges. Cut a 3'x1' foot hole in the 4'x4' peice for the stage area. Cut or fit the 3' pine or oak shelf in. Secure with screws or nails. You can cut holes in the two smaller side peices if you would like. Use a lid or something for a perfect circle. I did and it looks nice. Paint all the peices. You should have 3 peices now.
After the paint dries, attach the hinges to the side panels about a foot from the top and the bottom. Then attach the hinges to the front 4'x4' panel with the stage. Hang the curtain rod on the back of the front peice. Buy or make some curtains for the stage that hang down a few inches below the stage.
Finally, attach a chain to the inside just below the top of the side panel and the front panel to keep it from opening all the way and falling down. Do this to both sides.
I did have some of the parts but if I had to buy everything, it would have been about $25. Timewise, painting was the longest step. But, I figure I spent about 4 hours from start to finish.
Have fun and great dirty.
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